Reincarnation
Submitted by Anonymous on Thu, 05/28/2015 - 20:26
Yemi came home from a beer joint late one Friday evening stinking drunk (as he often did) and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep.
He gave his wife a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white robe. Who the hell are you? Demanded Yemi, and what are you doing in my bedroom?
The mysterious Man answered This isnt your bedroom and Im St. Peter.
Yemi was stunned, You mean Im dead!!! That cant be, I have so much to live for, I havent said goodbye to my family. youve got to send me back straight away!
St Peter replied, Yes you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We can only send you back as a dog or a hen.
Yemi was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen. A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground.
This not so bad. he thought until he felt this strange feeling welling up inside him. The farmyard rooster strolled over and said, So youre the new hen, how are you enjoying your first day here?
Its not so bad replies Yemi, but I have this strange feeling inside like Im about to explode.
Youre ovulating explained the rooster, dont tell me youve never laid an egg before.
Never replies Yemi.
Well just relax and let it happen. And so he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that had ever happened to him ever!!!
The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he felt an enormous SLAP on his face and heard his wife shouting, Yemi, wake up you drunken bastard, youre shitting on the bed!
He gave his wife a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white robe. Who the hell are you? Demanded Yemi, and what are you doing in my bedroom?
The mysterious Man answered This isnt your bedroom and Im St. Peter.
Yemi was stunned, You mean Im dead!!! That cant be, I have so much to live for, I havent said goodbye to my family. youve got to send me back straight away!
St Peter replied, Yes you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We can only send you back as a dog or a hen.
Yemi was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen. A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground.
This not so bad. he thought until he felt this strange feeling welling up inside him. The farmyard rooster strolled over and said, So youre the new hen, how are you enjoying your first day here?
Its not so bad replies Yemi, but I have this strange feeling inside like Im about to explode.
Youre ovulating explained the rooster, dont tell me youve never laid an egg before.
Never replies Yemi.
Well just relax and let it happen. And so he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that had ever happened to him ever!!!
The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he felt an enormous SLAP on his face and heard his wife shouting, Yemi, wake up you drunken bastard, youre shitting on the bed!
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