Computer Assistant
Submitted by Anonymous on Mon, 09/21/2015 - 20:01
Akpos called a Computer Assistant on phone to complain and this conversation took place...
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: May I help you?
AKPOS: Yes, I am having trouble with WordPerfect.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: What sort of trouble?
AKPOS: I was just typing along and all of a sudden the words went away.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Went away?
AKPOS: They disappeared.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Hmm, so what does your screen look like now?
AKPOS: Nothing.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Can you see the C prompt on the screen?
AKPOS: What is the C prompt?
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Never mind. Can you move the cursor around the screen?
AKPOS: There isn't any cursor. It won't accept anything I type.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Does your monitor have a power indicator?
AKPOS: What is a monitor?
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: It is the thing with the screen on it that looks like a T.V. Does it have a little light that tells you when it is switched on?
AKPOS: I don't know.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Well then, just look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?
AKPOS: No, it's too dark in here.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Dark?
AKPOS: Yes, my room's light is off, so the only light I have is what is coming from my window.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Well, you had better turn on your room's light then.
AKPOS: I can't.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Why?
AKPOS: Because there is no light.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: No light? Okay, do you still have the boxes, manuals and packing stuff that the computer came in?
AKPOS: Yes, I kept them in my cupboard.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: That is good. Go and get them and unplug your computer and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.
AKPOS: Really? Is it that bad?
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Yes, I'm afraid it is.
AKPOS: Well, alright then what do I tell them?
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Tell them, you are too stupid to own a computer.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: May I help you?
AKPOS: Yes, I am having trouble with WordPerfect.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: What sort of trouble?
AKPOS: I was just typing along and all of a sudden the words went away.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Went away?
AKPOS: They disappeared.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Hmm, so what does your screen look like now?
AKPOS: Nothing.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Can you see the C prompt on the screen?
AKPOS: What is the C prompt?
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Never mind. Can you move the cursor around the screen?
AKPOS: There isn't any cursor. It won't accept anything I type.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Does your monitor have a power indicator?
AKPOS: What is a monitor?
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: It is the thing with the screen on it that looks like a T.V. Does it have a little light that tells you when it is switched on?
AKPOS: I don't know.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Well then, just look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?
AKPOS: No, it's too dark in here.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Dark?
AKPOS: Yes, my room's light is off, so the only light I have is what is coming from my window.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Well, you had better turn on your room's light then.
AKPOS: I can't.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Why?
AKPOS: Because there is no light.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: No light? Okay, do you still have the boxes, manuals and packing stuff that the computer came in?
AKPOS: Yes, I kept them in my cupboard.
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: That is good. Go and get them and unplug your computer and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.
AKPOS: Really? Is it that bad?
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Yes, I'm afraid it is.
AKPOS: Well, alright then what do I tell them?
COMPUTER ASSISTANT: Tell them, you are too stupid to own a computer.
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