Valentine Rules

Dear Nigerian Boyfriends,

We the Nigerian Girlfriends Association (NGA) are expecting our boyfriends to observe the following rules from now till 15th February...

– You are not allowed to take any one-week impromptu trip to the village to visit your uncle’s brother husband. No fake business trips! No disappearing acts!

– You are advised not to fake any form of terminal disease or sickness. Be warned!

– No "bad phone, bad network, bad battery, phone speaker is bad, power button is not working" excuses.

– No ‘ATM is not working or card has been blocked’ excuses. You have from now till Friday to register your BVN.

– You are advised to increase your tolerance level for all our excesses. No ‘we should go on a break’ ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ or ‘I have been thinking about this relationship’ speech will be accepted.

– Third service, fourth service, prayer meeting, youth meeting and fasting MUST NOT be used as an excuse come Sunday the 14th.

Please pass to respective parties. We thank you in advance for understanding.

Signed
By @Naijasinglegirl,
On behalf of Nigerian Girlfriends Assocition (NGA)