General Jokes

After she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just dreamed you gave me a diamond necklace for Valentine??s Day. What do you think it means?""You??ll know tonight," he said.That...

JUDGE: Now then, please tell me what are the charges against you? AKPOS: I was caught shopping very early...JUDGE: That doesn't seem like an offence to me... What do you mean by "...

DERMATOLOGIST: Good News my dear, after looking through your test results I'm happy to report you will no longer be plagued by pimples.GIRL: Wow! That's great! Why?DERMATOLOGIST:...

Ochuko walks into a bar and sees his friend, Akpos at a table drinking by himself. Approaching Akpos, he comments, "You look terrible. What's the problem?""My mother died in June...

Akpos entered a fashion shop to buy a red shirt. At the shop, he discovered that there were only black shirts.AKPOS: I'm looking for a red shirt.SHOP ATTENDANT: There are only...

KWAME: Dude, why do you want to swallow a magnet?AKPOS: My wife says I'm not ATTRACTIVE again...

A Husband and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "...And you are no good in bed either," and storms out of the house.After...

Akpos works as a shop attendant in a grocery store. The shop sells fruits only in full basket. One day, a huge man came in and demanded to buy half basket of fruits. Akpos tried...

BIKE MAN: Where are you going to?PROSTITUTE: I'm going to the mortuary. BIKE MAN: Sorry it's late, I can't drop you there except you pay me 3000 naira.PROSTITUTE: No problem, when...

A Blonde was very broke. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a child and hold him for ransom. She went to the school playground, grabbed a child, took him behind a...

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